This is What My First Love Has Taught Me to Love Myself More
Here’s what i get by loving him.
I met my first love five years ago when I was 16 years old. When I was wondering why my friends could be madly in love with their spouses, love was accidentally present in my life that evening in 2016. My heart landed on seventeen year’s old boy — a year above me. I fell in love with how he made the atmosphere warm around him.
He was a supportive person. He read my writing and gave his best support when I went through difficult situations. Over the years, I became his secret admirer. I was not brave enough to confess my feelings.
I remember how he took me out to dinner just because we went thru same direction to home. I wish I had a better dress-up because we just got back from our decoration project. Since then, I have paid great attention to my appearance and wish I had the opportunity to have dinner with him again. Finally, I decided to express how I felt on his birthday, about how I saw him and admired him for the past five years. But I didn’t get that ‘answer’ to keep this feeling and I decided to move on.
However, I am grateful for his presence. I feel grateful that his presence allows me to feel those oxytocin hormones and see someone as a man. I remembered how I smiled after thinking about him when I did window shopping at a store and thought to get a good batik shirt to support him. Moreover, I was happy because those little experiences made me look into myself deeper and ofc with a compassionate way.
People have rightly said, “first love doesn’t always work, but it never goes away from your heart”. First love shows how we once loved someone sincerely and directs to the fact that we can love someone else when we might not know how. Loving him as my first love made me realize that I could give myself the same thing, to love and support myself unconditionally as I did my first love.
I couldn’t more agree with the quote ‘when we meet someone it can be either a blessing or a lesson. But when you meet your first love, you have both’. Even if it doesn’t work out sometimes, first love will always have a special place in our hearts. So, what lessons did you learn from your first love?
